Well here’s a first…

I woke up this morning with a splitting headache.

More specifically, I had a splitting hangover. I NEVER get drunk, because to get drunk, one would have to drink. Since I drink about one beer a month, you can see where I’d be a little confused about how I came to be in this agony.

I went to a New Year’s Eve party at one of my Dad’s friend’s house out in lovely Conyers, Ga. My host is notorious for his parties, and I snagged an invite this year. It was really a stunning affair, and I’m damn happy to have gone.

Just so you can get a taste of the atmo at the party…

The buffet:

  1. BBQ pork and brunswick stew – some of the best I’ve ever had, and I’ve eaten my share over the years.
  2. Pastrami, corned beef, and roast beef – ordered from a deli in NY.
  3. Escargot
  4. About 20 lbs of lobster tails, swimming in garlic and butter.
  5. Shrimp, with some of my Dad’s infamous cocktail sauce

The food was definatly first rate, but the alcohol was the real story. I was slamming back big glasses of $60 a bottle cabernet, apparently with no concern about the amount I was knocking back.

Around 11:30, my new buddy Ed reccomended to the host that the fellas should be drinking the good cognac. I’m not a huge brandy drinker, but I figured what the hell, we’ve been drinking $60 wine, smoking $20 stogies, and scarfing lobster by the pound – why not go all the way?

Next thing I know, I’m pouring from a THREE HUNDRED DOLLAR BOTTLE of 1970 Armanac. Holy crap, batman…that’s some high living. At one point, I think I double-fisted some champagne with the brandy. I can’t be certain.

I know that I was D-r-u-n-k, faithful readers. Drunk off my ass and desperatly trying to not make an ass of myself. Of course, 30 minutes later, I’m part of a crowd of people singing that David Allen Coe song (you know…the “I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison” song) at the top of my lungs.

I guess if 10 people do it, you can’t call jack-assery on them.

No resolutions – I’d just break them anyway.

I’m going to bed.

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